January 3, Home

Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home.
-C.S. Lewis

There is beauty amongst the ashes. There are roses amongst the thorns. As long as you take time to look God has strewn our paths, however difficult or overwhelming they might be with bits of happiness, joy, and loveliness. We aren't home. Home lies at the end of this journey but He is here and as long as we look to Him through it all, here can be a very lovely inn for keeping us warm for the stay.

The Bible says that we should store up treasures in heaven, not earthly treasures. I think that the saying "home is where the heart is" (although meaning something very different originally) is just another way of saying this very thing. None of us are truly content because this isn't home. If we were content here then what would be keeping our eyes on the prize? The little joys, happy moments, absolute astonishingly beautiful things aren't meant to satisfy us but to draw us closer to the Creator. It's all His doing, all His blessing; it all comes from above, from home.

The settled happiness and security which we all desire, God withholds from us by the very nature of the world: but joy, pleasure, and merriment, He has scattered broadcast. We are never safe, but we have plenty of fun, and some ecstasy. It is not hard to see why. The security we crave would teach us to rest our hearts in this world and oppose an obstacle to our return to God: a few moments of happy love, a landscape, a symphony, a merry meeting with our friends, a bathe or football match, have no such tendency. Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home.
-C.S. Lewis
The Business of Heaven

January 2, coming in out of the wind

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird; it would be jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining in the egg. We are like eggs at present.
-C.S. Lewis

Last night I decided to start writing my second book. I never finished the first one. It started to lay itself out right before my eyes. "Perfect! This will be perfect!" What better time to start writing a book then January 1st? I began right away. I thought I could easily spend 30 to 45 minutes a day writing and editing and by the end of the year at least I'd have a masterpiece. "I'll finish this one for sure!"

Only after my grand plan was laid out did I have a tiny inkling of hesitation. Something inside of me was saying that this was not the time and that I should stop almost before I had even begun. I knew the something all to well. It didn't sound like fear or feelings of inadequacy. I was almost certain it was the Lord saying, "now is not the time." When you hear such words you have two choices before you. 1.) You can say, "no this is just fear telling me to stop. this is just my inability to complete anything rearing it's ugly head at onset. this is just me quitting before the start. I shall go on." or 2.) You can say, "yes Lord. I hear You." and then obey.

This morning as I read through today's C.S. Lewis excerpt in "The Business of Heaven" I could not help but smile and laugh and find complete reassurance that yes, it was Him speaking to me. I shall proceed with the original plan for this first month of 2015: simplicity. Beginning to write a book doesn't exactly fall into the parameters of simplicity. Uh huh, I will come in out of the wind. "Yes Lord. I hear You."

The real problem of the Christian life comes where people do not usually look for it. It comes the very moment you wake up each morning. All your wishes and hopes for the day rush at you like wild animals. And the first job each morning consists simply in shoving them all back; in listening to that other voice, taking that other point of view, letting that other larger, stronger, quieter life come flowing in. And so on, all day. Standing back from all your natural fussings and frettings; coming in out of the wind. 

We can only do it for moments at first. But from those moments the new sort of life will be spreading through our system: because now we are letting Him work at the right part of us. It is the difference between paint, which is merely laid on the new face, and a dye or stain which soaks right through. He never talked vague, idealistic gas. When He said, 'Be perfect,' He meant it. He meant that we must go in for the full treatment. It is hard; but the sort of compromise we are all hankering after is harder- in fact, it is impossible. It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird; it would be jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining in the egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.
-C.S. Lewis
The Business of Heaven

January 1, it is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us

No amount of falls will really undo us if we keep on picking ourselves up each time.
-C.S. Lewis

What an encouraging word to begin the new year with. I begin today with a new picking up of myself, dirt and dust and broken bits included. The fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. My daily walk is one of attempting to remember to seek God first and hoping to grow these fruits. Often times I feel completely barren, much like the fig tree that Jesus withered (oh what a dreadful thought). Thank the Lord that Jesus didn't come to earth to wither us but to sanctify us, bring us into right relationship with God, and grow the fruits in us that we on our own completely lack. Praise God that no matter how many times I fall He keeps picking me back up.

"It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us." Anger, laziness, gluttony, lack of self control, and a hint of bitterness; I'm very aware of a good deal of dirt within this jar of clay and I'm all the more thankful for the Lord's grace and mercy as the dirty spots come into light. Today is a new day.

I know all about the despair of overcoming chronic temptations. It is not serious, provided self-offended petulance, annoyance at breaking records, impatience, ect. don't get the upper hand. No amount of falls will really undo us if we keep on picking ourselves up each time. We shall of course be very muddy and tattered children by the time we reach home. but the bathrooms are all ready, the towels put out, and the clean clothes in the airing cupboard. The only fatal thing is to lose one's temper and give it up. It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence.
C.S. Lewis
-The Business of Heaven

Day 350, Three Years Later

My little sister has just blessed my socks off. That's a strange expression I've heard at church one too many times considering that I've just repeated it no matter how silly it sounds even to me. She's just returned home from a mission trip to Guatemala. Normally we send out support letters and the trips are paid for in full by supporters. I've gone on four trips with groups from my church that completely changed my life. I can honestly say that I wouldn't have been able to go on any of them if I had to pay for the trips on my own. For this trip my sister received very little financial support and paid most of the costs herself. I commend her for this because she does not have a lot of money and she willingly used much of her savings to go and work her butt off in the mountains of Guatemala for a week. She also chose to go with a group of total strangers from a church on the other side of the state as there were no teams from around here going right now. She believed that this was God's timing and that she was supposed to go now. Her trip was great and she is grateful that she followed her heart/ the Lord's leading. I cannot commend her enough for doing so.

Today I return to "Doors of Change: to have or to be" three years later to blog about not something I am but about something I have. I spent an entire year of my life writing and thinking about "being" as opposed to having. But today I have something that I am trying to not let go of, something that I'm hoping will cause me to be. (that paragraph was a fun read, eh?)

Starr has revived something in me like those shocky paddle things for a heart attack victim that I was slowly losing sight of. Thank-you little sister for following the Lord's leading. I don't think dreams often just die with a bang. I think they usually fade out of sight and then get lost forever. Sadly mine have been fading and then I search them out again, fading and then, "oh, there you are little bugger," fading and then... I'm not letting them go gosh darn it! If you've read from me for very long then you know I long to be a good mom, to adopt someday, to serve the Lord/ follow His plans for my life, and my heart resides in Guatemala.

I've wanted to adopt/ take care of children who've been orphaned for as far back as I can remember. The first year that I went to Guatemala I was changed. I became an entirely new person with new eyes and a new heart. The second year fell deeply in love with the country and with the people there. The third time I went I longed with every fiber of my being to adopt an orphaned child from that country. Eight years ago (wow, that was a long time) I sat in a church service never even thinking once about going on a mission trip. My one heart's desire was to be a mom. I wanted a child to care for. A video played at the front of the sanctuary. It spoke of orphans and widows, building homes, and feeding hungry children. At the end of the video I heard as clear as day spoken to my heart, "Go. Be a mom." I stood up, walked to the foyer, and wrote my name on the list for the mission trip. There was NO doubt in my mind that God wanted me to go to Guatemala and love the children there. He told me to go. We were supposed to go to an orphanage, according to the video but we never did. In fact we spent a ton of time playing with the children at the feeding programs and at the build sights, falling in love with them, and trying to share God's love with them but I always wondered a tiny bit about the word I heard, "be a mom."

I don't know if adoptions from Guatemala are still closed. Last time I was there they had recently been closed. I do however today, stronger than ever believe that it is God's plan for my and my husband's lives to adopt a child and I would be without faith if I left out "from Guatemala." I have a vision. I don't know when it will come to fruition. I did almost let it go. Right now my husband isn't super keen on adopting. Right now he has ZERO desire to ever visit Guatemala. Right now we don't have the financial means to accomplish anything out of the ordinary. But I have a vision. I do believe that one day my husband, myself, and my son will be together in Guatemala and we will bring back an orphan. I must believe this vision was given to me with purpose, that it is in the Lord's timeline to see this come to pass someday. I must stand on that. I had started to waver. I had started to think I would never return to that country (you do not know the ache in my heart that comes from this thought). I had started to consider maybe adopting from wherever. But I believe my child will be born in Guatemala.

I've seen lately, so many people abandon their dreams, let go, and chose alternate paths that just seem easier. I can't make anything happen right now but I'm not letting go. I need to take steps in the right direction (PRAY much MUCH more) and hold on to my vision. It's mine. I have it. I'm not letting go.

Day 349, I am More the More I Have

I shan't pretend that I can maintain two blogs BUT in an effort to regain some semblance of a normal life I've begun another read through "To have or to be?" I can't remember the last time I picked up a book. Oh, how I do love this one. I've read through only 4 pages and I think I've two pages of notes already. Ahh, literature, I feel a bit like a human again.

Every time I read this book I feel as though it's the first time. The words on each page jump out at me with new insight; new thought provoking delicacy. I'm pondering at present the discussion within the first four pages of pleasure. Epicurus believed that pleasure is the highest goal of life. BUT pleasure by his definition "equals the absence of pain and the stillness of the soul." To him and most others before the 17th century the factual existence of a desire did NOT constitute an ethical norm. In other words just because you desire to steal, for example, does not mean you should.

The 17th and 18th century philosophers differed greatly and believed that the aim of life was the fulfillment of EVERY desire. Thus negative driving forces were ok because as long as one felt that drive it was ok to fulfill it, and possibly encouraged that he should. After all, the aim of life is fulfillment of that/those desire(s).

I am in love with the phrase used to describe Epicurus' pleasure: the stillness of the soul. Just reading those words is comforting to me. I believe it's why minimalists seek refuge in less. There is such a sweet calm in uncluttered surroundings. I believe it's why we still escape to wilderness places to clear our minds. I believe it's why yoga and meditation are so craved. It's what makes jazz beautiful. It's why gazing at the stars is so soothing. It's why silence is golden. "The stillness of the soul" is SO pleasurable. There is truly stillness in simplicity, in less.

And one must acknowledge that acquiring every want does not grant this stillness. I'd argue to the contrary that acquiring more and more and more causes chaos in life. Especially if the desires you're fulfilling are harmful to yourself. MANY desires are harmful. But that is the argument of today. It seems to me that, and especially in the political arena, we're fighting with each other over which desires are just. Epicurus would say ones that bring about peace/ stillness are just. Modern society seems to differ. I feel the world in which I'm living believes that more often than not a desire deserves to be sought after. "I am more the more I have!"

I find a delight in pondering the opposite. Am I more when I have less, when I'm free to embrace the stillness of the soul?

Progress, Day 348

I've been focusing so hard core on not spending money, on budgeting, on trying to pay things off, on planning ahead; I have hardly been able to think about anything else. It's exhausting and at the same time exciting.

I'm beyond words thankful for this blog, for the change it's created in me, and for this next step towards freedom that I'm now able to take due to the growth that has come out of it. I would NEVER have been to stick to a super tight budget if it weren't for the last year. I know... I tried... I failed NUMEROUS times.

"$12 a Day", Day 347

I'm stepping it up. In 2010 I purchased 57 things. Honestly I think that's amazing. I think that although I would have liked to do better that's a ridiculously low amount of stuff. I did struggle tremendously however with spending a lot of money on food and food and food.

This year, 2011 I'm going to commit to tackling our debt problem. I'm going to stick with my new found purchasing (or should I say non-purchasing habit) AND I'm challenging myself to spend $12 a day on food AND household supplies. At present I'm super excited about this challenge. The not buying "things" challenge of 2010 was really difficult for quite awhile but I feel like a whole new person now. The not spending obscene amounts of money on comfort food (food in general) is probably going to be the toughest challenge of my life. 

I hate budgets. I find it impossible to stick to them BUT I need to get out of debt. In 2010 we paid off over $3000 in credit card debt. I'd like to quadruple that number in 2011 and I believe that with discipline I truly can. If I was able to purchase ONLY 57 things in over 365 days I can pay off $10,000 in credit card debt in one year!

I've started a second blog devoted entirely to finances. I won't pretend that it's going to be interesting to anyone BUT I know that it will help keep me accountable, on track, and it's going to be a great tool for recording my successes and failures. I am unbelievably stoked about this!

In case you're interested in random numbers and me whining about wanting Cadbury eggs: $12 a Day

Victory, Day 346

I genuinely do not want to buy stuff. 1 entire year of resistance and self discipline is over and I haven't one single urge to purchase one single thing.

THIS IS SO GREAT!!!

This is my list for 2010 purchases:
Every single thing I bought (groceries aside)
1. Socks for Husband 1.28
2. Work pants and Blue jeans 2.4
3. B-day Balloons (for Annabelle) 2.6
4. stretchy pants 2.27
5. Weatherstripping (for my front window with lead all over it that my cat insists on sitting next to) 3.9
6. "The Rendition" CD at show 3.12
7. socks (finally) 3.31
8. Batman (easter gift for Husband) 4.3
9. Baby shower gifts 4.3
10. Tank Top ($4) 4.19
11. T-shirt 4.19
12. Shorts 4.19
13. thru 19. Husband's Birthday 4.20
20. thru 22. Headbands and hair clips (totally unnecessary) 4.24
23. Nylabones for the doggies
24. Pig pez dispenser for Starr
25 thru 27. Guatemala bag, bookmark and coin purse 6.17
28. Flatfoot 56 t-shirt 7.1
29. Shower Curtain 7.4
30. Shower mat (it was a necessity) 7.4
31. Coloring book for Lucy 7.10
32. A picture frame (for a Christmas gift) 7.16
33. A new work shirt 7.26
34. shower curtain rod holder($1.19) 8.15
35. Greeting cards at Craft show 8.21
36. Canon 450D EOS Rebel xsi 8.20
37. New work pants (again) 8.29
38. Nylons : ( 9.3
39. Blue Jeans 10.19
40. socks (1 really cool wintery pair) 10.21
41. a cami 10.21
42. tiny nail scissors (my nail practically ripped off) 11.04
43. Guat Photographs 11.19
44. stickers 12.8
45. Necklace 12.9
46. Little pewter figurines (etsy) 12.21
47. thru 57. Christmas 12.22

New Year New Blog, Day 344

Blogging virtually every day this year has been incredible. I've learned a lot about myself. I've changed in very positive ways. I've grown.

I appreciate beyond words those few individuals who've faithfully read each posting. Seeing that people do care, that people are interested makes me feel like I'm not living in a box talking to a wall (which sometimes feels like a reality, I believe in everyone's life).

thank-you for reading.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Need, Day 343

I've been thinking lately about Need. (I have a feeling that I posted a very similar blog previously this year but I haven't the energy to search for it at present)

Essentially all we need is food, water, clothing (to protect against the elements), and shelter. But we believe so very differently. A very impoverished person, hungry and homeless on a stormy night would mostly have no other need than that of food and shelter. That individual would most likely not be concentrating on ideas of new shoes or luxurious foods like chocolate and sodas. The person accustomed to hunger and homelessness would be needing simply those things which he or she needs.

An individual who's used to consuming meager meals, but meals enough to satisfy their hunger; who lives in a ratty little building wouldn't be NEEDING food or shelter but that individual may feel they need new shoes, or better food, or more food, or better shelter.

An individual with access to any food they may want, with a luxurious home and everything imaginable (at least imaginable to the above mentioned first and second individuals) may still possibly need something. Maybe this individual is plagued by thoughts during every waking hour of their need for a new couch or a better television. Maybe this individual needs a new outfit in order to maintain sanity.

Is their an unwritten yet predetermined measurement for need existing somewhere? Does the second individual NEED better shelter? Does the third individual NEED a new couch? I don't think so. But if they think so does it become fact? Do each of us need only what we believe is necessity?

I think the world would have us believe so. As long as the truly impoverished people aren't knowingly dieing en mass then it's OK to focus on the hardly impoverished people closer to home. And if the hardly impoverished people closer to home are surviving OK then it's OK to focus on ourselves and our "needs."

But I don't think we have any need whatsoever that trumps the true needs out there. My husband did not need the PS3 Move which he truly believes he'd be unable to live without. The people in this world without food and without clean water they do need those necessities.

I don't want to circle back to shame here. I don't want to belittle the lives of others. I don't want to forget about the blessings that God has showered upon me and you and so forth. But I don't want to be foolish and ignorant and worse yet cold hearted (just pretending its not there because I can't see it).

Sick, Day 342

I've been negligent with blogging over the past few days. I've also been VERY sick and the computer has been utterly repulsive to me.

Jesse, Day 341

I love this man soooo much. He's one of the wonderful things about life, 

one of the many things I am thankful for.

Day 340

Well I'm up to 57 purchases now. Oh well. And Christmas is driving me CRAZY!!! I'm way WAY WAY to much of a procrastinator!

2010 Purchases, Day 339

I'm up to 54 purchases for the year. That's 54 non food things that I've acquired... although the vast majority of those items were gifts for others (22 of them actually). If I can get through Christmas and the next two weeks with making only 2 more purchases that'll put me at an average of 1 thing a week.

Honestly, to me that sounds like a ridiculous amount of stuff. I'd planned to buy as little as possible but one item a week, 56 things this year, well that seems like a lot. The crazy thing is that I've avoided literally a countless number of purchases. My consuming life has dramatically changed since I began this blog. Clearance items used to be unavoidable for me. I'd bring home several different things each week. And trinkets, I don't even want to get started on trinkets. I used to buy little things for people regularly. At first it was virtually impossible to pull myself from sales that now I can walk past without even flinching.

54 items bought, 22 gifted, and not even one pair of new shoes; I'd say that I've been quite successful this year in terms not buying things. Yay! I wish there was a way to calculate all the money I've saved.

Hello Winter, Day 338

Day 337

I'm trying to just relax and breath. Today I was overcome by all of my surroundings. As I drove to work the trees, cows... everything was amazing. I couldn't help thinking as I passed by hundreds and hundreds of naked trees how each one of them had survived so many winters, so many storms, they've each lived this long at least. Every single leafless branch from the largest to the tiniest twig had to have started out at one point as a simple little bud. The world is miraculous.

Every time that I started to feel emotionally overwhelmed today for whatever reason be it deep rooted wounds, foolish procrastination, obligation poking away at me, whatever; I decided to breath deep and let it go. Today life was ready to be lived and I was in no mood to let stupid nonsense stop me.

Well, thats my story.

A Prayer, Day 336

I lay my crowns at Your feet along side my brokenness. I trust that as You see me righteous and pure I too will soon be able to see. I lay aside my fear, anxiety, doubt, false truths and pride. I choose to cease waging war with myself. I've been bloodied and bruised for long enough. As I step forward and breath in deep a breath of appreciation and thanksgiving for the life that's been offered to me I choose the path which is most inviting to my feet. A path strewn with light and beauty. A path that leads to you only. Heavenly Father I look forward to being made new and to laying down my life so that I can know the truth. I realize now that every last bit of me, all of which I place at your feet is tattered and torn and in serious need of mending. I realize now that you've never asked me to let go of me but you've only ever offered to make me complete. Thank you for life.

One of those, ahhhh moments, Day 335

Torches together. Let us burn brighter. Maybe in living, in growing, increasing, in being we might inspire, impact, fuel a fire that lights the world. Thankfulness could be the impact I make. Shining light on the beauty that so often goes unseen could be a very important part of living. After all what is an artist but one who shows and shares and ideally shines an interesting type light in this world. That's like a breath of clean air or a cool refreshing drink. It might just be ok for me to just be me... no what do you want to be's... I'm just gonna be me.

Yay for living!

Purpose part 2, Day 334

This entire first paragraph is a link to a blog I wrote earlier. That blog is basically the beginning to this blog if you feel inclined to read it. So this overwhelming emotional cloud of unknowing, maybe a cloud of doubt has been hovering over me. The question raining down from it's presence is one of destiny/ purpose. What's the point? I'm guessing that the clouds main purpose is to keep me from getting out of the matrix but none the less it's there. I can give the cookie cutter Christian answer to that question and I honestly believe it to be true. The point is to fall more in love with God, draw nearer to Him, hear Him more clearly; the purpose is to live for Him.

Most people's purpose is directed towards something more tangible. People find purpose in their careers, in their families and significant others. Well my job is dumb and I don't have kids and my husband and I have very strong identities of our own and although I am genuinely only half a person without him he's not my purpose in life and I'm not his. I can capture all the neat photographs imaginable. I can clean my house until the cows come home. I can be a hard diligent worker and I could possibly even pay off all my debt and get my life all in order but what's the purpose? 

After spending a year focused on "being" focused on not "having" I'm finding it difficult to even rationalize that one should "have" a purpose (even though the cloud of questioning refuses to budge). Does there always need to be a goal? Should conquest and victory and accomplishment play such huge roles in our lives? Isn't it ok to love life for what it is? Isn't it ok to exist to exist (that sounds dumb, but I mean it); to love, to appreciate, to see beauty and be moved by it, to be? Something within me says "no, it's not ok. You must strive for..." But you know what, I don't want to strive for... anymore. I LOVE the idea of living free from want, free from finish lines and on your mark get set... I love the idea of life being the point. 

And the inward battle continues. I believe that I should be ridiculously thankful for the air I breath, for the health in my body, for the overwhelming shower of blessings that rain down upon my life, for the family and loved ones that surround me... there should be NOTHING to strive for, to NEED... there shouldn't be a purpose. Okay, that sounds like a cop out. What I'm trying to say is that life is wonderful. This world is beyond amazing. There aren't words to describe it's beauty. One could spend every single moment of an entire lifetime simply appreciating this place. The people spanning the globe are incredible awesome little glimpses of our Creator and they're each so unique and wonderful. Why do we need more? That's my question. 

What is this inward itch that's pushing me to conquer; something, anything, it doesn't even matter what it is, my mind just tells me that I need to make an impact? But I want to be impacted. 

Here's the thing: I've identified that I believe inwardly and emphatically that I am a failure. I can work it over and over again in my head but my heart knows this (false) truth. When I type the above announcement, "I am a failure," when I say it my heart cries out a shout of relief. In the same moment is beats a schizophrenic rhythm of comfort from having been given the opportunity to release what's been held within for so very long and sadness from knowing the truth, the absoluteness, the certainty of failure. 

I'm guessing that my NEED to accomplish, to go out there and slay a dragon, my NEED to HAVE a purpose is in direct correlation to my belief that I am a failure. If I can overcome the (false) truth; if I can accomplish and conquer and be victorious THEN the I'm free. But that's stupid. I'm already free. I already know (in my head) that I'm not a failure. This thing called life is so messy and this is getting really long again.

The point is to follow Christ. I can think of no alternate purpose and thus I shall pray for sunshine and watch as the cloud of unknowing dissolves. Live. Love. Experience beauty. The truth: life is too precious to waste on false truths, insecurity, and chasing after the wind.  

Choose Life, 333

For what great nation is there that has God so near to it, as the LORD our God is to us, for whatever reason we may call upon Him? Only take heed to yourself, and diligently keep yourself, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren. I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live; Set your hearts on all the words which I testify among you today, which you shall command your children to be careful to observe—all the words of this law. For it is not a futile thing for you, because it is your life, and by this word you shall prolong your days in the land which you cross over the Jordan to possess. Duet 4:7,9 30:19 32:46-47

God didn't want His children to stray from Him, from His Word (which is Life), from His path. Most of the Old Testament consists of God instructing His people how to LIVE and beseeching them to not stray from the path. Interestingly enough many and most of us are or have been perplexed by God's instructing the Israelites to annihilate every living creature they came upon in the land He was bringing them into. Today I see it a bit differently. God was instructing His children to destroy the lies, to destroy the falsity, to annihilate a plague that would destroy them (and that did destroy them) if they let it exist. 

We can listen to people, observe with our own eyes the supposed truth, and believe the false reality that's been woven into ourselves or we can listen to God and see the truth through spiritual eyes, through eyes of faith. All of the sudden I feel like the majority of the old testament was saying exactly what I've been seeing as of late. The impact this world has upon us is so harsh that God called it death. He instructed His children to eliminate the picture of false truth that was nothing but a curse to them. He was constantly beseeching them to not let society rule their lives. He taught them of life; He set the truth before them and asked that they gird themselves in it and pass it on to other generations the same way the Mayans have passed on their tribal clothing for centuries. God was begging them to not give in to the man made reality that we so often dwell in and He so very clearly explained that doing so would be the end of them (and it was). 

This still reigns just as true today. Although Christ has covered our mistakes and redeemed us from our foolishness we're asked to follow the straight and narrow, to carry our cross, to choose life and truth and follow Christ. I think following Christ is exactly the same thing as when God said to the Israelites, "Set your hearts on all the words which I testify among you today, which you shall command your children to be careful to observe," and so on and so forth. We aren't to follow this society which surrounds us. We're to "hate/ love less" those things (and people) which we cling to as truth. The only truth is in God, in His word. Get out of the matrix. Cling to what is true; Discover what is true. 

Or you can exist within the matrix if you want to. That's your choice. Even God said so very clearly that He's given us that choice. Do what you will. I'm clinging to what "I know," to what's comfortable (in my mind), to what experience has taught me BUT I am realizing that truth is separate from what I know. Life is far beyond what I've been living. 

Oh, my goodness, I'm a rambling fool this morning.