We war not against flesh and blood or caffeine, Day 50

January was superb. I spent the entire month seeking the Lord and pondering life. I quite possibly grew more inwardly during January than I did in all of 2009. During this time of growth, revelation and numerous beautiful moments I resolved to give up coffee.

The past 18 days I’ve faced extreme bouts of depression, constant weakness and lethargy, incredibly unbearable cravings to consume sugary edibles I less than need accompanied by a drive to acquire, buy, fill my void with stuff, and ridiculous physical sickness including massive headaches, a really lengthy intense cold, sharp pains just below my abdomen, sleeplessness and extreme acid indigestion which has awoken me on several occasions and prohibited further sleep. I mustn’t neglect to add that my poor husband has been living with a monster who bites his head off for simply saying hello. This has been a terrific month!

Thus far while treading through hell I’ve accounted for every horrible incident by proclaiming, “It’s the caffeine withdrawal.” Every single day thus far I’ve beseeched God for help. Practically begging I ask, “Please help me survive this day,” and I haven’t ceased to be yet.

Shortly after I posted yesterdays blog as I lay in my bed, adamantly hoping against chest pains during the night, I realized that I’ve been an absolute fool concerning the caffeine blame game I’ve been playing. Not once in the past 18 days have I’ve stopped to consider that there was possibly more to this situation than just an awful detox. Somehow for 18 days I forgot that I have an enemy who desires nothing but the worst for me. My seeking God is the absolute worst thing I can do as far as he’s concerned. I’ve been asking God to help me win this war but I’ve been fighting against myself and not against the enemy.

Put on all of God's armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies and tricks of the Devil. For we are not fighting against people made of flesh and blood, but against the evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against those mighty powers of darkness who rule this world, and against wicked spirits in the heavenly realms. Eph. 6:11-12 (NLT)

Moral of the story boys and girls: Try not to get addicted to anything. The chemicals in your body shouldn’t be messed with. And don’t forget who the real enemy is. The war isn’t against flesh and blood, or caffeine and sugar, or alcohol and heroine, but against a fallen angel who wants to kill you.