A teacher I had once said that when someone craves a hamburger it's their bodies way of telling them they need protein. The hamburger was chosen because it's something that person likes/ something familiar but it's the protein that the body wants. The teacher said that in theory if every time you crave a hamburger you eat shrimp or chicken you would stop craving hamburgers and you'd start wanting shrimp or chicken. If my monster is the distorted voice of reason then I need to stop fighting with it and start trying to hear what it has to say. I might not need a hamburger but I might desperately need protein.
I sat the little creature down this morning, stared straight into its yellow eyes and declared a truce. I let it know that today I want peace and quite. I want to be healthy, which includes eating well and exercising. I don't want to be depressed. I want to be happy. I want to enjoy living. "Today little monster I want you and me to get along." I'm done yelling at it. I'm done trying to beat it into submission. I'm done exhausting myself while I throw all the punches. I always lose the fight anyway.
Then came the difficult part. I asked the distorted voice of reason what it wants. The little monster growled, "Delicious foods, sugar, caffeine, coffee... to rest, relax, take it easy. OOOhh, how bout we go on vacation? We could drive across the country, see the Grand Canyon and the red wood trees, eat at all the little dives and escape it all. I want to enjoy life!" To which I replied, "We're going to enjoy life but we're going to have to compromise!"
I fear this is going to be a long journey. But it looks like I'm finally starting to get somewhere.
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