The Norms by which society functions also mold the character of its members.
-Erich Fromm
I’m slowly learning how to be, how to exist, how to experience, how to breathe. I’m fighting the urge, my almost innate drive to be by having. I went back to work today after a 10 day vacation. (I work at Meijer’s; it’s a supermarket for those who aren’t aware) All of the Christmas leftovers are on clearance 75, 80 percent off. I felt a gravitational pull towards the $1.99 boxed Christmas cards. I watched as my hand picked up a few different boxes. My eyes scanned the images, somewhere within me a tiny voice peeped with a desperate desire to own them. “I need these,” the voice whispered. I snapped back to consciousness, placed the bargain greetings back on the shelf and walked away. Next the pink, red and white sugary sweet valentines’ candy called to me only for a portion of a second. Then I had to make a deliberate effort to steer clear of the toy department with the bargains falling off of every shelf. My nieces and nephews and Sunday school children… I have a hard time saying no to the perfect buy once I spot an item to increase the having existence growing within those cute little people.
The struggle I faced today wasn’t a terrible one but the fact that I’m unconsciously drawn towards things in every aisle, things I DO NOT NEED, things that will only add to my current debt, things that will clutter my home all the more (or someone else’s), things that will take time to maintain, it almost makes me crazy thinking about it. What within me desires so strongly to have? I’m afraid it’s a social cultivation. I’ve been raised in a society that needs, wants, craves, desires, and has to have… more. Before I went to Guatemala I believed that wanting and working for more was merely the course of life. But honestly I do not need any more, and I don’t think I want any more either.
I want to be able to enjoy what I already have. I want to enjoy each moment for what it is, and not what I can acquire within it. I want to open my eyes and see life, beauty, growth, and truth, all around me, and then to be satisfied by these. I desire change and thus I believe that I shall.
Do not love the world or the things in the world.
1 Jn. 2:15
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment